July 9th, 2011, it was almost like a dream, like I was watching a movie of what shouldn't be my life. I watched as my husband was given the news he had cancer. Not knowing what to say or do as this news was dumped on us by a careless ER doctor, I tried to stay calm for his sake. I made phone calls to share the news... Pain that we thought was kidney stones, turned into a nightmare. 12 days is how long my husband was in the hospital, in reality not bad for this kind of diagnosis. He had his kidney removed (thankfully God gave him two) and the cancer had not spread that they could tell. His recovery of course was much longer than 12 days. The surgery left him with multiple scars and took him months to recover fully from. He visits his doctor for a check up every six months now along with routine CAT scans, ultrasounds, and lab work to make sure all is well. So far he is still in the clear! And for that I thank God.
When faced with something that could have easily been so much worse, it has been very easy for me to see the beauty in this. I thank God for the extreme pain that my husband was in. The doctors told us that normally when this type of tumor makes itself known, it is too late. This type of cancer is treated best with surgery, it does not respond well to chemotherapy or other treatments. So for that, I am so thankful that it presented when and how it did.
Certain things happen for a reason, I don't believe God says "here, I think you need some cancer in your life", but He can use any situation for His glory. Having the all too real fear of losing my husband, my best friend, helped me understand his role in my life. He is my best friend, without him I would not be who I am today. That probably sounds cliche' but it is true. He helps me to be silly, to let loose and not be so uptight all the time. He loves me even after I yell at him or nag his ear off. His love is not conditional. I could live my life without him, but I sure don't want to. He is my best friend, my partner in life.
I realize that a cancer diagnosis is life altering. It can be minor, or it can be life shattering. No matter what it does physically, it makes you look at your life and shows you what truly matters. It isn't the house, car, the job, the bills; what matters are the ones that you love. Everything else can wait. Make time for those that you love.
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